Have you ever being over the moon and in the darkest dungeon at the same time? That’s what happened to me recently, leading to a massive gratitude for this to happen, because it gave me a clear vision of what is in my power, no matter what, and what is not and I'll let go.
Here’s the picture: on one side I have the joy and even the exhilaration of receiving confirmations from intentions set with courage long ago. It took years of commitment, focus, stretching the boundaries of what I believed was possible, investing time & resources for the sake of learning and acquiring familiarity with what I wanted to have in my life. It hasn't always been a path of joy and happiness but the desire to dare and to make it happen was the driver and the motivator to keep going, showing the north star when at times I though I lost it.
On the other side, the pain and even the depression of acknowledging that some situations never change and keep bearing rotten fruits that make me sick. People disrespectful of other’s feelings and ways of living, luck of empathy and kindness.
Looking a little closer I started to notice the qualities of me in those 2 situations, both happening the same day, almost on the same time.
I simply noticed how much of me was alive, life affirming and active versus being passive, resentful and reacting from fear while taking in the two events.
When I look at it from this perspective, I know I have a choice: I can’t change what others think or do but I can certainly change how I think and behave. How I act from my choice and I'm response-able instead of re-acting to something external and feeling the pain of being a victim.
This realization opens the door to a lighter path where suffering is still present but it doesn’t crush me, because…“it’s not about me!” and I can do something about it.
The life changing bold statement from Don Miguel Ruiz “Don’t take anything personally” (from The four Agreements) is revealing how much of our behaviours towards others is the reflections of our own beliefs and fears and individual perception of the world. The same applies to the others and here’s the consequence: what people say and do to us is more about them than about us. If we fall victims of something we have no power on, there is no hope but sadness and victimhood. If instead we choose to love ourselves and be fair with our own intentions and integrity, we can claim our value back and empower ourselves, letting go of what doesn’t belong to us, not even in the first place and strive for what we want to have in our lives.
We can vaccinate ourselves against hatred and rejection and envy or any other poisonous unwanted offering. We can always choose to say yes to what we want and no to what doesn’t make us grow or live respectfully and with kindness with ourselves and others.
Easy? Sadly not! Powerful? 100% yes! and so rewarding for every inch of life we can claim back, for how we want to live and shine and allow everybody else to do the same.
